You get a strange feeling when you’re about to leave a place, I told him, like you’ll not only miss the people you love but you’ll miss the person you are now at this time and this place, because you’ll never be this way ever again.
– Reading Lolita in Tehran by Azar Nafisi
Four years ago I came to Europe, marveling at everything around me. The old architecture, the beautiful landscapes, the cobbled streets. I’ve been here before but never long enough to have to wash my own clothes. When mum dropped me off at university, I was excited at what lay ahead of me. The new friends I’d make, the cooking classes I’d take, the boys I’d meet, the partying that I’d do and the alcohol that I’d drink.
What I didn’t expect was to experience all that I did. From having insane snowball fights to 8-hour road trips (whatever happens in St. Tropez, stays in St. Tropez!); from learning how to properly polish wine glasses and cutleries to eating my first ever microwave meal; from getting insanely drunk at my birthday to barbecuing in our back lawn- these are memories that I will cherish forever.
“The hardest part of saying goodbye is having to do it again every single day. Every day we face the same truth that life is fleeting, that our time here is short…”
Bridge Over Troubled Waters– One Tree Hill
I hate goodbyes. Whether it is over Whatsapp, Skype, emails, in person. Even though you know you’ll talk to or see them again the next day, the time between the last goodbye and the first hi could be anywhere between the next ten minutes or two whole years.
The hardest part though, is saying goodbye to my man. Every single time, no matter if it’s when I go to bed, or when he goes to bed, when he has to drive or when he’s having dinner with his family, I hate saying goodbye. We are currently nine hours apart and it is killing me. Every day I have to drag myself out of bed, reminding myself to be strong and live life, when all I want to do is curl up and weep.
My man visited me in Switzerland for two weeks in May. Needless to say, it was the best two weeks of my life. After six months of not seeing each other, I indulged him every single day for the two weeks that he was here. Sure we had our fights, but that does not compare to the exuberant love that we had for each other. I simply could not get enough of this man.
Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists.. it is real.. it is possible.. it is yours.
More quotes as I indulge in these ladies and One Tree Hill. They fit the theme of life (as usual) and growing up (since I just graduated college). So for all you people out there who are a bit lost, take a read and maybe it’ll help you find something. Click on the continue reading button for more!
I go through phases. Somedays I feel like the person I’m supposed to be, and then somedays, I turn into no one at all. There is both me and my silhouette. I hope that on the days you find me and all I am are darkened lines, you still are willing to be near me.
-Mary Kate Teske, The Glass Child
She was terrific to hold hands with. Most girls if you hold hands with them, their goddam hands dies on you, or else they think they have to keep moving their hand all the time, as if they were afraid they’d bore you or something. Jane was different. We’d get into a goddam movie or something, and right away we’d start holding hands, and we wouldn’t quit till the movie was over. And without changing the position or making a deal out of it. You never even worried, with Jane, whether your hand was sweaty or not. All you knew was, you were happy. You really were.
And Hansel said to Gretel “Let us drop these breadcrumbs so that together we find our way home.” Because losing our way would be the most cruel of things. This year, I lost my way.
And losing your way on a journey is unfortunate. But losing your reason for the journey is a fate more cruel.
The journey lasted eight months. Sometimes I travelled alone, sometimes, there were others who took the wheel and took my heart. But when the destination was reached, it wasn’t me who arrived. It wasn’t me at all.
And once you lose yourself, you have two choices: find the person you used to be, or lose that person completely.
Because sometimes, you have to step outside of the person you’ve been an remember the person you were meant to be. The person you wanted to be. The person you are.
One Tree Hill- The Tide That Left And Never Came Back
I thought the worst was over when I got over what happened last summer and winter, but shit kept hitting the fan.
It’s been a year and three days since I’ve started this blog.
To commemorate this incredible achievement (because I was able to start something without quitting), I will- you guessed it!-post some quotes from the most recent book I finished- Thanks for the Memories by Cecilia Ahern.
If you’re looking for a quick and easy read about a rather unconventional love story that covers family and loss, this is your book. Upon reading the first couple chapters, I thought I would get bored as it was pretty predictable, but as the pages grew thicker in my left hand and thinner in my right, I had no idea I was going through the book so quickly. Before I knew it, I’ve learned more about love and loss in a couple sittings. It’s okay to be lost, it really is. Sometimes it takes getting lost to be able to find your way back again. Since I’ve also just graduated, these quotes are a great reminder that it’s totally okay to be unemployed! So here are some of my favorite quotes from the book:
“We all get lost once in a while, sometimes by choice, sometimes due to forces beyond our control. When we learn what it is our soul needs to learn, the path presents itself. Sometimes we see the way out but wander further and deeper despite ourselves; the fear, the anger or the sadness preventing us returning. Sometimes we prefer to be lost and wandering, sometimes it’s easier. Sometimes we find our own way out. But regardless, always, we are found.”
“It’s like my garden, love. Everything grows. Including love. And with that growing everyday how can you expect missing her to ever fade away? Everything builds, including our ability to cope with it. That’s how we keep going.”